updates

Hello everyone. It’s been awhile since I’ve posted an actual blog post. Over a month I believe. A lot has happened over these past months. This is going to be one long post, so sit back and enjoy! My company shaneD.net hosting services endured two server attacks witch we recovered nicely from. While dealing with those, my relationship with rose took a turn for the better. I finally got up the courage to tell my parents about rose and myself and our plans to move in together. To my astonishment and joy, both parents were supportive of me 100%. They really wanted to meet Rose, so I started putting things in place for Rose to come over for the Christmas Holidays. After a few setbacks regarding transportation, as of Monday, Rose is going to spend the Christmas holidays at my house! I’m happy to say Rose will finally have a christmas holiday to remember for the rest of her life. The past two years for her have been hell at Christmas time, and I vowed that this year would be different, and I’m proud to say I’ve been able to make that happen! We’ve had some crap from the school administration, but persistance has paid off and the school is finally understanding that this relationship is much much more than a game. I’m not playing around, I’m dead serious about this relationship, and no matter what I am told, I will be their until the death do us part. This is god’s will, and god’s calling for me to be apart of this wonderful girl’s life, and I thank god every waking moment for her. She’s the joy in my life. She’s been my rock when I’ve needed someone. She’s picked me up when I’ve hit rock bottom. She’s kicked my ass when I’ve needed it. She’s the reason I carry on each and every day. Everyone might call me strange for writing this, but let me tell you dear reader one thing, I’ve been better with her. She’s my all. God has brought us together and made it possible for us to stick by each other through it all. We had a rocky start but god made this all possible, and nothing else will ever break us apart.
I’d like to share a little something with you all. Something I wrote about two months ago. I never thought I could write this, but god’s hand was involved with this, and I’d like to share it with you all.
Begin poem.
True relationships never really die
And family isn’t defined by blood
It’s made strong by bonds that won’t break
Tempered and tested by trials and pain
what you mean to me is more than words can describe
you’ve been loyal to me from the beginning
And no matter what happens between this moment and then
I shall be always thankful to have you in my life.
You’ve been their when I’ve needed someone to talk to
you’ve been their when I’ve needed a hsolder to cry on.
When things got tough, you were always their, ready to help, and assist me.
You made me see my errors and helped me fix them
you brought me to an understanding that I’ve never had.
You’ve showed me what it means to be loved and what love really means.
It’s not the words or the intimacy that defines what love is.
it’s the closeness, the bond between two people, that make love what love is.
You’ve showed me what it means to be happy, to have someone who truly loves me.
When I asked you that day way back when, I expected to be rejected, to be pushed away because of who I was, what I had done in the past.
Not you. You excepted me for who I was.
You didn’t ask me to change who I was, to change my personality to suit your needs.
You became my rock, my everything.
You are the reason I continue to carry on through the tough times.
You are the reason I want to get up in the morning.
You are my strength, my shield, my all.
Without you, I don’t know where I’d be.
I love you, and will love you forever and ever.
End poem.
Dear blog reader, as you read through that little piece of writing, I hope that makes you understand my true feelings for the one I truly love, and will do whatever it takes, even death, to protect her and make sure she is cared for. It’s been almost a year for us both, and it feels like we’ve known each other our entire lives. I’ve shared things with Rose that I never thought I’d ever share with anyone my entire life.
This has turned into a long post, but it’s not overyet.
A lot of people have said to me that I’d never be able to succeed in a relationship, I’d never have someone that cared about me. That is not true, and if the contents of this entry doesn’t prove that, I don’t know what will. I’m not going to take anyone’s crap, I’ve worked way too hard to leave now. I still remember the night, back in February of 2006, and I remember it all like it was yesterday. I still remember the day in March when things got nasty, and we had to rethink it, it hurt me, and I thought god had let me down again. As the saying goes, things have to get worse before they get better. When Rose approached me in July, and asked me if I wanted to be her boyfriend again, I had to seriously think about it. I’d been hurt before, and I wasn’t ready to be hurt again. I took two weeks and thought, and praid about it. I asked god to guide me in what to do, and he has done so. We’re together, and I’m not leaving, ever! I’ve said it before, and I’ll continue to say so time and time again. I love that girl to pieces and I’d do anything to make her happy, whatever it took. Those who know me well, know that when I say something, I mean it. When I say I’m going to be here, and you can count on me, and I would do anything to save and protect someone, you can bet your ass that I mean it! When it comes to things like this I don’t joke around. I’ve already delt with one loser who decided to screw with me and my relationship. They were dealt with harshly, and lord help him if he ever screws with me and my girl, again! If he does, so help me god, it’ll be the last thing he ever does! This isn’t very nice of me, but if I have to kill him to protect hir, I will! I really hope he learned his lesson the last time, so it won’t have to come to that, but if it does, then so be it! I’d rather see him dead then hurt the one I’ve sworn to protect and charish. We may not be married, but you can bet your paycheck that if we have our way, it’s going to happen.
We’ve already discussed the matter, grin, and it’s what we want. What else can I say folks, besides what’s already been said here. It’s reality and that’s life. I’m not going to leave just because crap gets rough. That’s not me, and anyone who knows me at all should know that by now. If you don’t then, I’m sorry to say you are officially stupid and demented in the head. I know your all probably calling me stupid because of the length of this post and your probably calling me stupid for me writing my feelings about the one I love. Well, to bad for you, it’s my blog, and I’ll write about whatever I feel like. You can like it or lump it. No matter, it’s my blog and I’ll write about what I want to write about and if you don’t like it, well, then you can just shove off. I’ve really got nothing else to say.
Before I go, let me just say one more thing.
I thank god each and every day for the people in my life. I thank him for bringing me and Rose together and keeping us together through it all. I thank him for people like Kelly, Kevin, hailey, Emily, and everyone else who has stuck by us both and givin the both of us support and advice when we’ve needed it. Without you guys, I’m not sure where I’d be.
Their hav been times where I’ve wanted to just give up on god and the whole relationship thing, but something told me to stick it out, and one day I’d find someone. And boy was everyone rright on the money! Not everyone are complete jerks, and their are people that give a crap. in this world.
Rose hasnt’ cared about my differences. She excepts me for who I am. She doesn’t ask me to change to suit her needs and wants, and I don’t expect her to change for me. When their’s a problem we sit and talk it out and not fight over it. I’ve learned that I don’t have to be scared to bring situations to her attention, and I’m thankful for that comfort.
Well, that’s all I have to right.
Thanks all.
May the lord bless you and keep you safe.
May heaven smile upon you, and with you I am praying.
Until next time folks.

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